Chennai: The city may find it hard to shed its “conservative” image, but if the rising divorce rates are any indication, Chennai is fast achieving a dubious distinction.
The city is witnessing a steep rise in divorce cases, with divorce rate figures having doubled since last year.
According to a survey conducted in the city recently, almost 70 per cent of the divorce cases involve couples below 35 years of age.
The reason for this trend is interesting. A growing awareness about their rights is convincing people to rush to family courts to file cases of separation and divorce, which was not the case earlier.
The decline of the joint family system, marriages by choice, late marriages, absence of pre and post marital counselling, economic independence and poor marital values are some of the many reasons being cited for failed marriages.
Chennai has just three family courts, all of which are currently occupied with over 3,000 divorce cases, a majority of which have filed under the Hindu Marriage Act.
"I got married in 1984 and he divorced me in 1988 through a lower court. He has a relationship with another woman. I got an order in my favour in the higher court. I have been going to the courts since then. My son, who was a kid then, has completed his graduation from an engineering college. I filed a petition to live with him (my husband), but he did not accept it as he has an affair with another woman. Now, I have applied for settlement that too is not getting over" a divorce petitioner, Sujatha was quoted by news agency ANI as saying.
Advocates dealing with these cases feel that children are the worst sufferers as their parents fight it out.
"In every break up, you cannot have happiness. Obviously, there is someone who's going to be affected, particularly when there are children in the family. Undoubtedly, children are going to be affected. Collectively, if parents are going to take a decision in the welfare of the children, then there may be reconciliation," said an advocate, Nandakumar.
"The reason for this, I feel, one is the break up of the joint family system. When there was a joint family system, people could ventilate their feelings among their relations and there was some way of also compromising within the family itself," said Sudha Ramalingam, an advocate.
Advocates also say poor tolerance levels contribute to the collapse of a marriage.
"Definitely, tolerance levels have gone down because of our … attitude, exposure to different ideologies, western culture and norms and late marriages. We have a set of ideas. We do not want to adjust, we cannot adjust also. It's very difficult," added Sudha Ramalingam.
While television is filled with soap operas about evil mothers-in-law and conspiring sisters-in-law, the reality, surprisingly is no different in Chennai.
Ramalingam also said the parents of the spouse can also be one reason for a marital break up.
The insecurity that the spouse of their son or daughter could eat into their rights, leads parents in some cases to encourage minor differences between the couple.
She advocates that marriages should not be based on sentiments alone.
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