Avoiding Common Mistakes
Stay away from spice. Unless your body is accustomed to high levels of spice, choosing a faire like Thai or Indian could irritate your stomach and lead to discomfort, gas, or even worse (read: diarrhea). Not a great way to start a date.
Avoid excessive fats. Fats are the most dense macronutrient, and can take as long as eight hours to digest. Foods like pizza or fettuccini alfredo can make you bloated, sleepy, and give you indigestion.
Skip the milk and cheese. Along the same vein, lactose-heavy foods such as mac and cheese can leave you gassy, bloated, and irritate your stomach. More pungent cheeses can also leave a lingering smell on your breath--not the best way to invite a goodnight kiss.
Pass the gas. Beans contain oligosaccharides, a sugar molecule broken down in the large intestine that releases gas. While nutritionally great for you, that might not be the best choice for a first--or tenth--date.
Forget the garlic and onions. While garlic and onions have great anti-inflammatory properties, their odor can permeate your skin for up to twenty-four hours after consumption. Unless you’re on a date with someone who loves those smells, save the pungent odors for later.
Avoiding Messy Foods
Forego foods with lots of sauce. Ribs and wings may be delicious, but their saucy nature makes them terribly hard to consume without a huge mess all over your hands and face. As a general rule of thumb, if your food requires a moist towelette, it’s best to avoid.
Skip soups. Nothing brings attention to the crude nature of eating like slurping down some chowder. The combination of the noise, the potential mess, and hunching over a bowl are a losing combination.
Ignore the lobster. It may be tempting to order a whole lobster to impress your date. But between trying to wrestle your crustacean out of its shell, getting lobster juice on your hands and butter on your face, wearing a bib, and setting an expensive precedent, it might be something better served for a date much, much further down the road.
Making Good Impressions
Don’t order fast food. Besides being filled with extra fats and carbs which will make you bloated, tired, and gassy, you may also be telling your date that you’re not willing to treat them to a nicer place.
Eat unprocessed foods. Skip the fish sticks and chicken tenders and order fresh fish or grilled chicken. Besides being chock-full of preservatives that may add to bloating and gas, you may be putting off vibes of immaturity.
Don’t eat salad as the main course. Leafy greens are nutritionally fantastic, but besides being difficult to digest (creating gas and discomfort), they can get stuck between your teeth.
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