How to Show Your Parents You Love Them

Spending Quality Time

Ask them about their life experiences. The most valuable thing you can offer your parents is your time, and they will really appreciate your doing so. Sitting down with your parents and asking them about their lives shows you care and take an interest in them. You may even learn something about them you never knew before. Begin the conversation by saying, “What was it like for you growing up?” Or you could say, “I think it’s really cool you went backpacking across Europe. What was that like?” It’s sometimes difficult for a child to remember that their parents have lives, too. What’s more, it can be hard to believe that their lives didn’t always revolve around you and your siblings.

Join in on a hobby. A great way to bond with your parents and demonstrate affection is by doing something they are interested in. If your parents have interests or hobbies, participate with them. Activities are much more enjoyable when you have someone doing them with you, especially when it is your child. They will appreciate you showing interest in what they like and the time you’ve taken to engage with them. For instance, if they enjoy sports, strike up a game with them. If they attend a book club, ask if you can join. Spending time with them while they are doing something they love will create happy memories for all involved.

Cook them a meal. There’s a good chance your parents have been cooking for you your entire life. Now is the chance to turn the tables. Give them the night off and cook a meal from the heart—even if it’s macaroni and cheese! Don’t worry if your meal isn’t perfect. Your parents won’t mind if your cuisine isn’t five-star. They will only appreciate the time and effort you put into meal.

Go to religious services with them if they are religious. If your parents attend religious services, one of the most thoughtful ways to show you love them is to attend services together. There’s something special about sharing your faith and worshipping with others, especially parents and your children. This heartfelt gesture will surely be something they remember for a long time. Make it a weekly thing, if possible, to attend devotional or other spiritual meetings with your parents. You can even learn meditation together. Alternatively, ask your parents more about their faith. This will also help show them that you care and are interested in their lives.

Share your life with them. Parents, particularly after children become teens or adults, often feel excluded from their children's lives. Make an effort to include your parents in what's happening with you. For example: Introduce them to your friends. Share essays or projects you did at college. Invite them to your kids' birthday parties. Ask them for advice about dating.

Helping Them Out

Tidy up the home. This will show respect and take some of the load off of their shoulders. If you live at home, make sure you take an active role in keeping it clean, particularly your room. If you don’t live at home, stop by once or twice a week to help out. Wash and fold the laundry. Clean and put away the dishes. Pick up after yourself and others. Run the vacuum around the house. Cut and rake the grass for them.

Offer transportation. You were probably the recipient of your parents’ taxi services for most of your life. Now, you can return the favor. Offer to take them to where they need to go, especially if they are aging and driving has become difficult for them. Even if they are still able to drive well, having someone offer to chauffeur them around is a sweet gesture. Stay respectful, especially if your parents are older. They may not like the fact that they need help driving. Asking their permission to drive them around, instead of telling them that you are, can make a big difference.

Handle repairs. As your parents age, they may be unable to take care of their home as well as they could before. Instead of having them call a handyperson to make household repairs, offer to do them yourself. If you are unable to, hire someone yourself so that your parents don’t have to spend the money. Your parents may not be forthcoming about what they need help with because they don’t want to burden you. Ask them directly how you can help. If they still won’t tell you, do some inspecting of the home yourself, or ask other family members if they know if something needs to be done.

Pay for what you can. Your parents have likely been paying for you for a long time. If you have the means, treat them when you can. Taking them out to dinner or paying for a vacation together is a great way to thank them for what they’ve done and to show your affection. If they are on a fixed income, try some of the following: Pay some of their bills. Buy their groceries. Cover the expenses for their pets. Work out a plan with them to help manage their finances.

Expressing Your Love

Tell them often that you love them. You may assume that your parents already know you love them. Even if this is true, it’s nice to hear those three little words. Tell your parents you love them whenever you can. You may be amazed at how happy it will make them. Take you time to say it and be sure to make contact. There's a big different between an "I love you, Mom," and a "Love ya!"

Write it down. Although telling someone how much you mean to them in person is great, there’s something about putting a pen to paper. Write your parents a letter thanking them for all that they have done for you. Having it on paper allows them to look at it whenever they want to remember your thoughtful words. It may also be easier for you to express yourself in this way, rather than saying it to them face-to-face. You could also write a poem or short story to express your gratitude and love. They will likely appreciate the time and effort you put into creating this gift for them. Another option is to send a nice e-card with a personal message if you are not the creative type.

Give them a hug. Touch is the most basic form of communication among humans. As a baby, your parents comforted you when you cried. As a growing child, they may have nursed your bo-bos or caressed you after a nightmare. Unfortunately, touch as a form of affection is often lost as children grow older. Offer your parents a hug to show your love. The act of hugging releases a bonding hormone that reduces stress and helps fight off physical illness. Hugging your parents more often could actually benefit their health.

Make them a present. No matter what their age or their children’s ages, parents usually love homemade gifts. They understand that it takes more time and consideration into making a present than it does to purchase one. Even if the present is less than perfect, they will still appreciate the gesture. You could paint your parents a picture, make them a card, take a portrait of them and put it in a frame, or even create a sculpture. Or, you can just dedicate an entire day to spend with them one-on-one.

Call them once or twice per week. Your phone calls don’t have to be long. A few minutes of your time is often enough. However, ensure that you are engaged in the conversation. Give them your full attention and they will appreciate that you put them first. Talk with your parents to decide how much telephone contact you all are comfortable with. Some parents may not enjoy talking on the phone as much, while others might like a weekly chat. Be sure to check what times work for them. Don't call them when you are spending time with others, driving, or are otherwise busy, as this will make them feel secondary.